Monday, March 5, 2012

My Father Eats Smurfs.

I always knew I was different.

Now I know WHY.

I'm different because my biological father is a cartoon character. I've narrowed it down to a selection of two...

The first is Mr. Burns from "The Simpsons". The bald, skinny, liver spotted stooped shouldered multi millionaire- he might be my father.

I don't think he is though. I mean, I'm SURE my mother could do better than an old man.

That leaves Gargamel. The skinny, stoop shouldered, balding evil genius who wants to eat the Smurfs.

I'm pretty sure he's my father.

I wouldn't have put it together if I hadn't had a sick kid home from school today.

Because when the Smurfs was released, I was disgusted. I mean, live action and CGI animation ruining one of my favourite all time cartoons? No thanks. I let the kids watch it without me once a while back.

But today, with Brat home sick from school, I had to keep her occupied while I kept the baby from destroying the entire living room. So, I rented "The Smurfs"... I wasn't PLANNING on watching it, I have about thirty odd other things I should be doing but, as it started, and I got the kids settled, I glanced up.

And I started laughing. Because until today, I'd never pictured Gargamel clearly as a 'person' vs a cartoon person.

But it explains so very, very much about what's wrong with me.

And now I know what Gargamel would look like if he were a real person. He'd look like Da.




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