PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT.
Having never had a "blog" before, I don't know who will be reading this, who won't, who will "stumble" here, and who comes because I send them the link.
So, I'll tell you this straight off. I'm not like you. I don't think like you do. I don't see what you see. I don't hear what you hear.
To start with, my grip on reality is constantly in question with people who know me.
Bears don't wear hats and talk their way into suburban homes. Regardless of what the news says- it just doesn't happen. More on bears later. Or, maybe not.
I do not have Tourette's syndrome. I do have a very poor verbal filter. If I have thought about it, chances are good that I said it. You've maybe met someone similar to this over the course of your life- hopefully, this helps you decode my thought processes.
Context does not exist around me. I may skip a conversation completely for two hours, and come back to it later.
Friends and family, over the course of years have learned to "speak Sarah" as they call it.
Quick course. 1) Sometimes (read: frequently), I cannot remember the word I am trying to say. This ends two ways. With a physical object, I will often describe the surrounding area, or I will make gestures. It's been called crazy charades. The second way loss of words ends, is that I will simply substitute another, completely random word for my missing word.
Ex. I need to go to, um, you know that place that sells stuff for babies, but also sells cream and makeup. And lotto tickets. And hair spray. I need to buy those things for the whatdyacomepippies. The thingermabobbers have to be in the place so they get to mom.
If this makes sense to you, you either A) know me or B) or you belong in a psych ward someplace.
If it did NOT make sense, try reading this. I need to go to the drugstore for stamps. Mom's letter needs to be in the mail today.
Frequently, I will simply make a new word up. They are exactly what I'm trying to say, albeit they probably don't show up in Oxfords' English Dictionary.
"Slowlier"- eg. The guy in the car in front of me was traveling slowlier than I was- so I passed him.
"Destick-ify" If you have kids, you know.
As a young adult, I made a conscious effort to limit these types of insanity in myself. Since having children, there is no good reason to try to be normal anymore. They would simply make me crazy again.
I will pick up with this later. Most likely. Or this will be my only post, and I will appear crazy forever.